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Sometime people see me as a good one. Sometime as a bad one. And sometime, as a weird one. This feeling, I could not understand. But this is what I feel. People will say, "It is not something to be thinking about." But what should I do? He's already stuck in my head. Who is he? I think you've known. He's someone that I cannot reach. I, cannot, reach. It is normal for us, as a teenager, to have this kind of feeling. But who will make us feel so? It depends on yourself. Including myself.
I never meet him. He never meet me. I've ever see him, everyday. But he never see me. Then, how does the feeling appear? I don't know. I really don't know. He just got my attention, about in the end of 2009. He's just, unusual. The way he sings, he plays the flute, he jokes, he cries, I just like it. Well, the most interesting is the crying part. 'Cause I never know any boy who dare to cry hard but my lil bro. And I think, that's how I like him. From his tears. A bit weird? Well, I'm weird, indeed. And he started to affect my mood. I could cry, laugh, even jealous and angry 'cause of him. Then, people start to see me, as a possessive one. Possessive, to someone that I could not reach. And that's how, people judge me as weird. They started to call out a-fake-disturbing-name. A joke, and laugh appear. But they never know what I feel inside, right?
Those things happen for more than a year. But who cares? He has already protected me, from having a boyfriend, doesn't he? I don't have to have any boyfriend, 'cause I have him. Though we never meet, but he never fail to make me happy. And that's the important one, right? Happiness. For me, he's more than a-mood-maker. He makes me know, how to take care my heart, before I give it to someone that I do really love. Do you want to know how?
By loving him.
And for now, it is enough.
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Random. See ya at the next post! (3 posts at November? So many la..)
